Last night, of course, we went to see Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. As a group of six, we foolishly tried to find a row of as many consecutive seats and could only be accommodated on either the first or second row. It's been over a year since I've seen a movie in the theater (the last one being V for Vendetta) and I seem to have somehow managed to forget THE reason I hate the theater experience: hearing every thoughtless, obtuse, puerile comment that is made by all those within earshot of my comfy-cozy stadium-style seat. After being in absentia from the theater for more than a year, last night was not only not an exception to this rule, it blew the top right off it.
It was the first scene of the movie when the Dementors come to visit Harry in Surrey, that I hear, in the thickest of redneck dialects mind you, "What the hell are those things?" Clearly being the authority on Harry Potter in the couple, a female voice of equal accentual caliber returned, "It's those ghost things from that movie before the last one, Rodney. Suddenly, I realized I had encountered a scenario I had never anticipated: rednecks at a Harry Potter movie. Don't get me wrong, I'm not under any delusion that hicks do not attend this movie franchise in droves, but that shrill twangy voice was the first embodiment of such a concept.
As the movie progressed, Rodney's comments ranged from audible confirmation of familiar elements of the movies (e.g., "It's Dumbledore!), to surprise of concepts which were completely new to him (e.g., when the Room of Requirement first begins to manifest itself: "Aw yeah, hidden door, hidden door!), to rooting for the protagonist (e.g., "Get him, Harry!").
Though annoyed at first, his infantile commentary became amusing, and I found myself trying to stifle a laugh at some of his outbursts, like when he called Voldemort an "asshole" toward the end of the film.
When the credits began to roll and the house lights came up a bit, I caught a glimpse of Rodney: an altogether unattractive man but redneck to the core, replete with John Deere hat and complimenting mullet.
Two worlds have crossed here. Who knows, I might reciprocate and find myself sitting behind Rodney in a Larry the Cable Guy movie.
But probably not.
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2 comments:
Ah East Texas, your patrons never cease to disappoint.
My favorite part was when Dumbledore defeated Voldemort and I heard from over my left shoulder what sounded like an angry hick lady that works at the DMV snort, "Well, looks like he showed you!".
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